I'm 30

This morning, at precisely 1:43am EST, I turned 30-years-old.

Leading up to this day, I went through an array of emotions.


Dread & Denial: thirty?! How did this happen? And so fast? I'm not ready, dammit! There's still so much left to do. I've never taken a cruise. I don't know how to swim. Still have yet to master a stick shift.

Pomp & Circumstance: fuck it. I'm going to throw a big ol' bash. You only turn thirty once! I'll rent out some ultra chic lounge in NYC and pop bottles all night. Or maybe copy off my homie Paul, and deck out an art gallery and make folks dress up and sip wine. Whatever I choose to do, it will be big and lavish.

Eh's & Shrugs: birthday? What birthday? Who's dropping thousands of dollars for folks to celebrate my day with me? Not I! Hell, it's still a recession after all. Who cares about turning thirty? It's just a number.

Thankful & Blessed: today, I feel great to be 30-years-old. I woke up, said a short prayer, cried a few happy tears and started my day. I think more than anything, I'm grateful. I have a lot going for myself. And I'm not oblivious to that.

My relationships with my loved ones are better than ever.

For example, my father called me this morning to say Happy Birthday. First time I've gotten a birthday call from him in 30 years.

*Takes a minute to take that in*

Whew!

Our relationship has been a rocky one. But a new journey has definitely begun, and I'm enjoying the ride.

While today is definitely a day of reflection, I'm careful not to compare my thirty to someone else's thirty. My path is mine and mine alone. And I'm okay with that.

Looking back, I have absolutely no regrets and I feel like I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing: surrounding myself around folks who don't just tolerate me, but really love and accept me for who I am; embracing my God given talents and working my ass off to show the world what I'm good at and allowing faith to lead me when I'm dissuaded by what I see.

Everyone is asking me what I have planned for today.

Well.

I folded my laundry.

Next, I'll run to the bank to deposit Mom's birthday gift to me. Aint nothing like a sentimental birthday card with a check inside. I don't know about you, but that always seems to tug at my heart strings.

Then, I'll hit up the gym, come home, pop in The Hurt Locker, lay back and chill.

And maybe I'll call up the Y and inquire about those swimming lessons too. But I won't be paying one cent until my body is beach ready. I won't be caught dead at someone's pool with this little cupcake gut I got. Nope. Won't happen.

Yeah, I just spewed all that esoteric ying-yang, but at the end of the day, I'm just a shallow man of a certain age.

*Shrugs*