Prom Night Redux

On my way home from work last week, I saw two white stretch limosuines cruising down the street carrying kids on their way to the prom.

A couple of guys were hanging out of one sunroof, profiling and flashing peace signs at us common folk. And hanging out of the other sunroof, were their dates screaming yeah baby and drinking what I hope was sparkling cider out of champagne flutes.

As they sped by me on their way to enjoy a night they won't soon forget, I couldn't help but think back to my prom nights.

I can remember it like it was yesterday: Finding a date, choosing colors, getting fitted for a tuxedo, buying the corsage, taking pictures, running for prom king, not winning prom king and trying to find something fun, grown and legal to get into afterwards.

Yep. Those were the good ol' days.

And by the grace of my bootleg scrapbooking skills and trusty scanner, those days are back, baby!

Here's a look back at my prom fashion: The good, the bad and the gaudy.

There I am on my way to my very first prom.

I remember this day vividly. I was both excited and nervous. I was only a sophomore going to the junior prom. That was huge. My date, Shalaa, whom I still keep in touch with to this day (Hey Shay!) asked me to escort her.

I felt like a superstar when I arrived to the prom and saw all of my friends standing outside waiting to take pictures of/with me.

We kept it simple and classic in all black with silver accesories. My mom bought me a pair of Oxfords and even let me get my ear pierced for the occassion.

Good times.

But that was only the beginning...

There I am the following year at my own junior prom.

Peep the cliche prom picture pose.

Large fedora aside, I kept it simple again. This time, instead of silver accents, I went with red to match my date's dress (Hey Swiyaa!).

Having already attended one, I was no stranger to the prom experience but this time there was an added twist: I helped plan it.

As class president, I was on the prom committee and we pulled out all the stops, turning the school gymnasium into a classy, makeshift ballroom: a flowing water fountain in the middle of the floor, an emcee who announced each couple as they walked in and a videographer who captured it all on camera. It was really dope.

There was only one glitch: The limo I arrived in.

Hood limo, tight car quarters and losing prom king aside (Hey Dustin!), I had a blast that night.

*sighs*

Like. For real. Where do I even begin with this astrocity I call a prom night ensemble? 

I look like a cheap pimp from Newark.

I look like an extra from the Dick Tracy movie.

This outfit is very Steve Harvey meets [insert name of one of the dudes from Jersey Shore here].

*lowers head in shame*

Let's play this one by the numbers.

1) Sunglasses - Word around school was that everyone would be rocking sunglasses to the prom.  I was working at CVS at the time and apparently looked up from my cash register one day to see these sitting on the cheap sunglasses endcap and thought they would be a perfect fit. 


2) I'll Cut Ya! - I went through this dagger phase. I don't know why. I don't know where it came from. And as randomly as the phase started, one day, it simply stopped. I'm weird.


3) Gaudy Ring - Why oh why do I have on a 10-carat gold pinky ring. You can't see them, but there is a cluster of  fake diamonds on the top. Where they do that at?


4) Random Tie - I remember exactly who convinced me to buy this tie.  I would hate to tarnish her fashionable reputation; therefore, she'll remain namelss. I got it from the tie bin at Marshall's.  To this day, I still don't know why I didn't just get a simple, solid color tie and call it a day.


5) Ill-fitting Belt - I had the suit and the ostentatious accessories but I still needed something that screamed luxury and class.  This was around the time everyone was rocking those Guess belts with the G for a belt buckle. But that wasn't good enough. So, I decided that I would buy a Gucci belt with the G for a belt buckle. I marched right into the Gucci store and found the perfect belt, except they didn't have my size. Like a dummy, I bought it anyway.  And the entire night my pants gathered in the front because the belt was too small.


6) Black Man Shoes -Every black man, at some point in his life, has to own a pair of Stacy Adams dress shoes. It's a right of passage. And there's nothing wrong with them. Hell, I just saw a pair of Stacy Adams Paramount Oxfords on sale for $50 on Macys.com that I would rock today.  But these here blue joints I got on at the prom: Fail. They were a soft woven raffia type of material.  I remember being geeked about the idea of my shoes matching my poplin. 

Apart from all that, I still stand behind this suit.

The color was nice, it was tailored well and fit great. I just didn't need all the flashiness that went along with it. A cream-colored suit with navy blue pinstripes is flashy enough on its own.

And in my defense, I wasn't the only one looking crazy that night. There was some of everything in the room.

Half of the girls thought they were Maya and were embracing their inner-Asian persuasion with chopsticks in their hair.

Some of the dudes were shirtless and Dustin won prom king again, except this time, he wore a damn dress (Hey Dustin! How you doin'?).

Do you remember your prom? What you wore? Who you took as your date?

If you were to stumble across your prom picture, would your outfit stand the test of time or would you be like me and wonder: What the hell was I thinking?

Are any of my former classmates reading this post? What's your favorite moment from our prom?

I'd love to hear your thoughts.